Generosity
Delia's Tips
A little Laugh
Stroke Victims
One of those days
FW: * NEW WORDS FOR 2007
New technology from Apple
Senior Centre
a short riddle
Blondes
Handy flight companion
Tuesday's FUNNY...........
Leave us blondes alone
to all my online friends
Chopper at his best: "Harden The F*@# Up!" NSFW
Yanks & Guns
Emoticons
[No Subject]
Amazing
If
Children are wonderful
I am only the delivery boy.
Apologies to the Italians......
My dog Skippy
senior citizen
CHOCOLATE HAVE PLENTY OF IT FOR NEW YEAR
Cowboy boots
Top 10 Christmas Carols For The Disturbed
Have you seen the world's shortest books?
great XMAS gift
great XMAS gift
SPECIAL GIFTS
Xmas Joke
The Cold
How true!!
FW: Port Adelaide Maths Exam
onions & christmas tree's
Japanese Illusionist
Many fathers
True friends don't let u drink n drive
MERRY CHRISTMAS from SANTA.....not!
Man of the house!
Lateral Thinking
Collingwood girls - gotta love them!
THE PUMPKIN
Fishing
Migrants Excuse
The medicine man
Office Skirmish...
Senior Thinking--a smile for your day...
FlightSim X Game
Serious Sergeant Major
Speedbandits NSFW
Tall stories
More Blonde Jokes
Question
What all blokes have been looking to find out...how to keep a woman happy
Monday Afternoon Smiles
The Yuppie...
Warning....beware of little fingers.....
Beer Entrapment - timely, being that it's Friday
Vet Fees
Man accused of having relations with dog
Real #911 Calls
Can you figure it?
God is good
Gender test
Blonde Joke for the day
Shopping for a blow up doll
HOW TO POO AT WORK
Fwd: FW: Fwd: Who says men don't remember anniversaries?
Fairy Story
First Kiss....
Simple question, simple answer
FW: Plane Stuff
sexist jokes, though entertaining :)
blondes
Last Child Support Payment
The Truth behind Women's Restrooms
blondes?
SYLVESTER AND TWEETY
10 Worst Company web Domains
FW: check this out!!
Futuristic Motel
snow
FW: Men are happier people!
WORLD WAR III IS COMING!
History Test
Drinking Quotes
mwa huh huh
approaches
Scientific study
acronyms
hooker joke
Time for a Quickie
Irish Coffee
nurses
so......... Who's Proof Reading?
Brave Men
WHY GOD CREATED CHILDREN
GOOD - BETTER - BEST
2 jokes
Pensions
Men Strike Back!?
Clever Aussie
FUNNY-- Cat lover or not
FW: Test for Dementia
A few things you have probably never thought about!
Joke of the Year
BEWARE OF SCAM...
Another Blond Joke
The extroidinary life of older people in the suburbs
They Walk Among Us
Little Johnny...............(again)
Mid Life Crisis...
Fairy tale
BLUFFING
dishes
THE JOKE THAT JUST HAD TO HAPPEN
Elmo joke
Charles and Camilla
LITTLE JOHNNY RETURNS
the audit............
FW: Help Desk Jokes - this is funny!
Women
Two women
the genie
AUSTRALIAN BRICKLAYER'S REPORT
Good joke!!!
Faulty Driver, Faulty Policeman
Joke of the week!
noah's ark
7 KINDS OF SEX
FW: More Sesame Street goodness
If football teams were women
FW: Your Brazilian shirt name
This is cool
Payrise
FW: Test for Cataracts........ NSFW
FW: Do you have 710?
Dear Dad letter....- brilliant!
FW: What a Great Idea! :-)
FW: ooohh im excited
FW: Full Nike Football ads - BRILLIANT!
quote from Robot Chicken
FW: Possible Recruit
FW: World Cup
FW: try to park the car - very addictive
FW: Four Friends
FW: Drivers Licence
FW: The story of Sheep
FW: Advice for a friday...
FW: pirate talk translator
WORTH REPEATING
"Sometimes when I reflect back on all the wine I drink I feel shame Then I look into the glass and think about the workers in the vineyards and all of their hopes and dreams If I didn't drink this wine, they might be out of work and their dreams would be shattered. Then I say to myself, "It is better that I drink this wine and let their dreams come true than be selfish and worry about my liver."
~ Jack Handy

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the hell happened to your bra and panties

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"I feel sorry for people who don't drink. When they wake up in the morning, that's as good as they're going to feel all day. "
~Frank Sinatra

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you are
tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading."
~ Henny Youngman

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"24 hours in a day, 24 beers in a case. Coincidence? I think not."
~ Stephen Wright

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"When we drink, we get drunk. When we get drunk, we fall asleep. When we fall asleep, we commit no sin. When we commit no sin, we go to heaven. So, let's all
get drunk and go to heaven!"
~ Brian O'Rourke

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy."
~ Benjamin Franklin

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does
not go nearly as well with pizza."
~ Dave Barry

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends over and over again that you love them.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

To some it's a six-pack, to me it's a Support Group. Salvation in a can!
~ Dave Howell

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

And saving the best for last, as explained by Cliff Clavin, of Cheers. One afternoon at Cheers, Cliff Clavin was explaining the Buffalo Theory to his buddy Norm.
Here's how it went:

"Well ya see, Norm, it's like this... A herd of buffalo can only move as fast as the slowest buffalo. And when the herd is hunted, it is the slowest and weakest ones at the back that are killed first This natural selection is good for the herd as a whole, because the general speed and health of the whole group keeps improving by the regular killing of the weakest members. In much the same way, the human brain can only operate as fast as the slowest brain cells. Excessive intake of alcohol, as we know, kills brain cells. But naturally, it attacks the slowest and weakest brain cells first. In this way, regular consumption of beer eliminates the weaker brain cells, making the brain a faster and more efficient machine. That's why you always feel smarter after a few beers."

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are whispering when you are not.
 
 
From Oto on 8/29/2006